Funny Monologues for Halloween

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Okay--Not ALL Halloween Theater has to be scary! Check out these comedic Halloween/Fall monologues, perfect for this time of year.

SIX (6) FUNNY MONOLOGUES FOR HALLOWEEN

MY MISSING SKITTLES: Sal confronts his dad after catching him red-handed with his Halloween candy.
DETAILS: Children, comedic, male/female, around 1 minute

A DAD’S DEFENSE: Doug tries to cut a deal with his son Sal, after he’s caught red-handed, stealing Sal’s Halloween candy.
DETAILS: comedic, male, around 1.5-2 minutes

ANNOYING ALIEN
Having an alien ship land in Maleeha’s yard is not as cool as she thought it’d be. In fact, this nosy, noisy, hyperactive, slime-dripping alien is kind of annoying.
DETAILS: Any gender, around 1-1.5 minutes, comedy

I DON’T WANNA BE A JEDI: Joel has to break some tough news to his Star Wars loving dad…
DETAILS: Children, comedy, male/female, around 1 minute

BORINGEST. GHOST. EVER
Ayla is pretty frustrated the ghost who visits her at night is sooooooo incredibly boring.
DETAILS: Any gender, children, around 1 minute, comedy/drama.

APPLE PIE PAIN: Holly confronts her husband about the lonely thankless hard work of making apple pies from scratch.
DETAILS: comedic/dramatic, female, around 1 minute

THE REAL VALUE OF CANDY: Fred is none too pleased with the low exchange rate of dollar to Halloween candy that his dentist is offering him.
DETAILS: Children, comedic male/female, around 1 minute

BABY ANTS IN A PIE: Robin’s freak-out over finding ants in her apple pie starts to shift when she realizes the ants are probably just innocent little babies…
DETAILS: Comedic/dramatic, female, around 1.5-2 minutes

CANDY WRAPPERS AT MIDNIGHT: Adrian wakes up in the middle of the night and confronts his father who stands by the kitchen pantry, guiltily holding Adrian’s Halloween candy wrappers.
(NOTE: This is a shortened adapted version of the monologue, MY MISSING SKITTLES)
DETAILS: Children, comedic, around 30 seconds, male/female

DISAPPOINTING HELL: Van has an altercation with his stuck-up soul which lands him in…well…Hell.
DETAILS: Dark comedy, 2-3 minutes, male (could be any gender)

And if you are looking for something a bit spooky, you can check out suspenseful monologues here, creepy Halloween monologues here and strange theater perfect for Halloween here.