New Comedic Monologue: On Washing Cereal Bowls and Other Millennial Matters
In 2016, the media went wild over research about why millennials were not eating as much cereal as their Gen Y and Gen X aunts and uncles. Just google it and you’ll see scores of articles with people really up in arms about the topic—and people up in arms about how people are up in arms about it! Apparently I was late to ingest this crucial news (was something else crucial going on in 2016?), as I didn’t hear about it until this year, when my elementary school child brought home a “close reading” article on the topic. He and I both had opinions on it, and while he got to share his thoughts in his homework, I took to dramatizing a moment inspired by it (thanks, Mrs. M.!).
So check out my new 2-minute comedic (dramatic) monologue for young adults, On Washing Cereal Bowls and Other Millennial Matters. In it, Amber explains to her mom how maturing has made her realize the importance of fixing the economy, and of making wise use of precious, fleeting time…All things, of course, that come into play when you’re talking about washing cereal bowls.
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ON WASHING CEREAL BOWLS AND OTHER MILLENNIAL MATTERS
by Tara Meddaugh
AMBER
That is not my cereal bowl, and I’m sorry, but, I don’t want to keep washing dishes that aren’t mine. It’s not because—no, listen, listen, Mom. It’s not because I don’t want to help out. I mean, I would pay you rent, but you said you don’t want me to. It’s just—you keep thinking I’m the one leaving cereal bowls in the sink, and I want you to know, it’s not me. I usually eat out. And that’s a good thing. It’s not a waste of my money, Mom, and I hate when you say that, because, it’s like, you’re not seeing how my generation is trying to fix the economy by supporting it. You know? We have to go to the small businesses to keep them open and give people jobs, and, you know…that could be me owning a restaurant some day, or one of my friends. Actually, Megan just told me she wants to open a gourmet chia seed and oatmeal café. I would totally go there. And you should too, Mom, because it’s so good for you and I’ve never seen you soak chia seeds at home. (pause) And you know, the reason I don’t eat cereal here, and create all these dishes that need washing? It’s really because…(pause) As I’ve grown up, I think I just kind of realize what’s important in life. And I realize how precious our time is. I know you understand, because this morning you were crying watching that old video of me when I was two and I was watering our tomatoes with the little turquois watering can—END OF EXCERPT
Click to download the entire free monologue, On Washing Cereal Bowls and Other Millennial Matters.