MARCH IN LINE
A dark comedy monologue for teens
By Tara Meddaugh
Stephanie has been bullied long enough and she is now making a point her community will never forget! She commands her troops to obey her every word and they are willing to even jump out a window for her. But first…she notices a problem one of her loyal troops is having… It’s Mr. Teddy. His stuffing is seeping out again.
DETAILS
Genre: DARK COMEDY
Cast: FEMALE/MALE, inclusive casting
Setting: BEDROOM
Age range: 13-25 years old
STEPHANIE
(to her bedroom stuffed animals)
I’m thrilled you all could make it tonight, gentlemen. I know I ask a lot of you, but I hope you all realize, I notice everything. Every tiny smile, every command obeyed, every sacrifice given. You’re my men, aren’t you? And tonight, you’re going to prove it.
(pause)
Now, I want you all to pick up your instruments and line up in—You! Stand up straight, please. I said, stand up! Would you like the whole town to see you in a wrinkled band uniform? Don’t answer, just listen.
(surveys the troops)
Now, form that single line and reflect on your assignment tonight. Remember, you’re more than simply clarinet players or baton twirlers. You have a mission, a purpose—and while you may not be here to witness the difference you make, know that I will. And that’s really what matters most, now isn’t it?
(pause)
So all those people who said I didn’t have a voice, who said no one would ever listen to me—those awful people, with their awful taunts in my head—“She called ‘fire’ and no one heard her!” “Have you noticed how the waiter never stops at her table?” “She can’t even get a dog to lick her hand!” Well—END OF EXCERPT
For the complete 2-minute dark comedy monologue, March in Line, click below: