THE REAL VALUE OF CANDY
A comedic children’s monologue
By Tara Meddaugh
© 2019
Fred speaks to his dentist about the office policy of exchanging 1 pound of Halloween candy for $1.00. Fred is not pleased with this deal and expresses the hard work he went through to get that candy. He decides he will not trade it in after all. He will do something else with the candy. He will eat it.
DETAILS
Running time: Approximately 1 minute
Cast: Male or Female
Age: 4-12
Genre: Comedic/Children’s monologue
Setting: A Dentist’s office
FRED
A dollar a pound. Really? Do you know how long it took me to get that candy? Do you know how many houses I had to walk to? In my costume? Without my coat on, because I wanted to look like a real superhero, not a superhero wearing a coat—
(THE MIDDLE SECTION OF THIS MONOLOGUE HAS BEEN OMITTED FOR PREVIEW PURPOSES. CLICK ADD TO CART BELOW FOR COMPLETE MONOLOGUE)
And that is why I will not be exchanging it. Because I know the real value of candy.
(pause)
I will be taking my candy home. And eating it.
(pause)
I will see you at my next teeth cleaning.
END OF PREVIEW EXCERPT
Click below for the complete children’s 1-minute monologue, "The Real Value of Candy"